I’m Breaking Up With You

Everyone wants to be accepted.  Some of us though have a NEED to be accepted.  I fall  into this category and I’m working on digging myself out.  The need to be liked and accepted outweighed my ambitions and goals.  In fact, I placed my goals and ambitions completely on the side.  I’m not sure when the need started, but I would say since high school.  This need is a terrible thing, it places you in positions you didn’t ask for or aspire to and it makes you feel like you’re always searching….for something….you just don’t know what that something is.  The need to be accepted is always looking for accolades; always looking for someone to say that you did good, always wanting to please, always wanting to be recognized…even if you didn’t do anything spectacular.  Weird right?

Am I needing acceptance right now while typing this blog?  Probably so.  But I hope not.  I hope not to seek accolades but write words that will release me to see my gifts.  I hope not to go after recognition but instead believe that I am good enough to give inspiration.  I don’t want anyone to like me because I’ve forced myself to laugh at their jokes, believe in their values or gave less of me for others’ benefit.  Needing acceptance is tiresome and I don’t have the strength for it any longer.  I’m making my way out of needing your acceptance, but just having your acceptance is enough.  In fact, by needing I’m really giving you too much power you can’t live up to….sorry about that…that’s just way too much responsibility for you.

  I am brave.  God has given me everything I need to believe in me.  I no longer need your acceptance, so I’m breaking up with you.  The little girl who longed for you to tell me that I’m good has finally believe she’s good enough.  The little girl who always wanted to make those around her happy is telling me, “Lady, we gotta go, ain’t got time to wait to see what they think!  Woman, you’ve been created to share love to those who don’t know their self worth; you’ve been created to show what God’s love look like.”    Gotta love that kid!

If you find yourself needing acceptance from others and it’s getting just too tired to keep trying to feed that need, my prayer is that the little girl or boy in you will awaken and the kick butt you experienced at age five when you rode your bicycle for the first time, fell off, got back on, kept on peddling until it became natural…. I pray that kind of tenacity fills you again, knowing that you are already great!  I pray that you are able to share the gift God has planted inside of you, not for accolades, but to bless the world.  The world has been waiting on you…. and me.

Go head on….. ride your bike!  I’m riding mine!  See you on the road!

Rev.  Jacqui